Telltale signs of a new mom

• When getting into bed you realize there is spit up on your pillow. You could care less and sleep on it anyway. The next night you realize that you never changed the pillowcase. You still don't care.
• You consider three consecutive hours of rest a "good night's sleep."
• A total stranger stops you in public to tell you that your shirt is on inside out...twice.
• You consider eating a meal during actual mealtime a "treat." And if you get to eat it with your husband, it's a "date."
• What once was routine—showering, putting on deodorant, and brushing teeth—is now a major accomplishment.
• You can tell time with your boobs.